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Congratulations! You’re going to be signed up to an incredible adventure with your loved one. You’re going to see amazing things, have wonderful, intimate experiences and live a completely new way of life. Now is the time to plan your wedding, but also to consider the reality of married life. Sounds daunting? Don’t worry, read on for some great advice.
Learn the local laws
It is important to learn the local laws surrounding marriage in your country. You may find that you will be paying different kinds of tax or may be eligible for new mortgage and bank schemes once you’re married. Thankfully, there are plenty of free online tax tools available online. Make sure that the local law doesn’t become a surprise to you and find out in advance.
Learn to be flexible and willing to compromise
Being flexible is an art, but it is something that you and your partner are going to have to start practicing. Before you are married you and your partner will need to plan the big day. You both may have very different ideas on how you would like it which may mean you’ll need to adopt some kind of compromise. Think of this as practice for married life, as things like vacations, sharing household chores, deciding where to settle down, etc, will also need to be talked about, discussed, and compromised in a way that will make you both happy and satisfied.
Keep channels of communication open
Following on from the earlier point, both you and your partner must make sure that your communication channels are always open. This means that you are easy to contact and have time for meaningful conversations everyday. Make sure your partner can feel at ease and tell you their worries, and be sure to let your partner know yours. You are there to support each other, after all. Communication is the key to a strong and healthy marriage.
Have clear expectations
With your channels of communication open, you will begin to learn your partner’s expectations for married life. Make sure they know yours too. Think about whether you want children or not, and if so, when you would like to have them. Talk about your career goals and dreams, and whether it might require that you move in the future. Discuss your dream home and how both of you would like to decorate it. Having clear expectations also includes knowing whether one will be the active breadwinner, or whether you will be dividing career life and household chores equally. Don’t let a messy bathroom ruin the marriage!
Wedding planning isn’t easy – But remember it’s your wedding day!
As soon as you announce to your loved ones that you’re getting married, take note and prepare yourself for the sudden blitz of ideas, suggestions and even demands. Yes, you got that right. Family members will have their own ideas about their relative’s dream wedding and will insist that you do X and Y in order to make it special for them. Sometimes they will have genuinely great ideas and valid concerns, but in the end don’t forget that it’s YOUR wedding day and you should have it how you want it.
Book the venue early to avoid disappointment
Many wedding planners will not emphasize this enough, so read carefully. Book. That. Venue. Now. Brilliant wedding venues usually have a very long waiting list, and it could give you and your partner a huge amount of disappointment if you can’t have that perfect venue for your big day. Stuck on venue ideas? Don’t panic, there’s loads of venue inspiration to be found, check it out.
The little details make the biggest impact
And here is the best advice you can get. The little details really do make the biggest impact during your wedding and your life. But what are these magical little details and how do you use them?
Let’s think about your wedding first. Little details could be that one personalized item sitting on the table at your wedding reception, or the little boxes of chocolates for the young ones to keep them happy. It could be the fairy lights hung up around nearby trees in your wedding colours, or the discrete thank you cards you took time to hand write to everyone attending the wedding. Considering spending a little on small and beautiful decorations and features at your wedding. You could purchase decorated paper lanterns, notepads and pens for guests to use for table games and little ornaments that speak volumes about your partner’s and your own personality. You could also fill these mason jars with treats as favors, which would look great in the wedding photos and could be a lovely keepsake for the parents and in laws.
And what about those little details in life itself? Think about all the ways you can keep married life fresh by telling your loved one that they are indeed loved. You could write them a poem, take them out for the day at a new restaurant you’ve never tried before, maybe even try something that neither of you would have thought about, like an on-the-whim skydive, a trip to the zoo, a massage course, etc. These little things that you strive to do will make the best memories.
Enjoy your new life!
Finally, don’t forget to sit back and relax into your new life with your loved one. Keep on communicating, make sure you both compromise when need be and you’ll be okay. Enjoy your wedding and enjoy life!
By Hollie Jones
Hollie is a freelance writer and co-writer for the Hollie and the Ivy blog. She has many passions including interior design, healthy living and crafts. And of course, she LOVES all things wedding. Hollie enjoys sharing her knowledge and experience with others through writing.