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Learning Acceptance

Someone who is happy with how they look and appears to have unlimited confidence, does a person like this even exist? It’s a radical we know but there is a growing movement, particularly among women, in praise of accepting your body, your look and how you are, exactly as you are right now. Not the future, when you’re this many kilos lighter or when your thighs don’t wobble so much, but right now. It recognises that you are, in fact fine, not perfect because who is but really, just fine.

In this blog we take a look at how to be fine with who you are and how to get some of that confidence that comes from this point of view, even when perhaps you’re not really feeling it at the moment.

Acceptance

Impossible? Sometimes it feels it but accepting that who you and what you look like is enough is the first step along the road to greater confidence in yourself. How do you go about accepting that your tummy isn’t as flat as you like? You take away the moral judgement from it. It might not be possible to love your wobbly parts, but it is possible to view them neutrally and accept that they come from having lived a life with great food, drinks and of course carrying children if you’re a mother who has given birth. It’s ok to live with them and be fine with that.

The other point to remember of course is that your physical body is not everything about you. Do you work? Are you a sister, mother, partner, runner or pet owner? Do you have a Master’s Degree? Don’t let your worth be dictated by a little extra flesh.

Image courtesy of Pexels

Confidence

It’s important to remember that confidence can be separated from body image and can be practised. You can adopt a “fake it till you make it” approach and after time you will find that your levels of confidence have grown while you’ve been rehearsing.

Confidence doesn’t mean being pushy or trying to be the centre of attention, it’s that quiet steeliness that allows you to tell people not to talk over you in a meeting and makes your viewpoint heard. It’s that backbone that gives you the strength to walk into a room full of strangers at a networking event and rather than shying away, launch a conversation and make a real impact on who you’re talking to. It’s also having the ability to set a strong and courageous example to your children about how they should expect to be treated and how to stand up for themselves with dignity.

In other words, confidence is what’s going to drive you forwards to achieving your life goals and has absolutely nothing to do with what you look like or how much belly roll you’re concealing.

How does confidence come about? Well, we’ve said that practise helps but turning yourself from someone who shies away into someone who shines, is a process.

Stop with the names

Not the names that others might call you, but the ones you call yourself and the labels that you’ve attached. If you’ve told yourself that you’re not worthy of getting that job or aren’t the right shape and size to achieve that position, it’s time to replace those names with some much more accurate ones.

Think of all that you’ve achieved to date and replace those negative associations with much more positive ones. Tell yourself daily the truth of who you are and begin to drown out that negative little voice that seems determined to keep you down.

We understand that confidence won’t happen overnight, so start with little victories that will give you a mental boost. If you know you’d look fabulous in a dress you saw in a shop store but lacked the confidence to go in try it on, afraid of others’ judgements of you, turn it around. March right in there and show yourself you’re worthy of dressing yourself nicely and with confidence. You might not be a Hair Makeup Artist but there’s no need to hide away, you are enough just as you are.

Becoming confident and accepting your body are skills that can be learnt and will only come about with practice. You deserve to see yourself the way that the people who love you see you. It’s time to put away those old habits that have made you feel bad and start embracing some brand-new techniques that release you into your full awesomeness.

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